Don’t Forget Your Relationship

June 26, 2009

This is a message for those couples who put so much energy into raising their children that they forget about their own relationship.

As a divorced parent and married again parent I tell you this is dangerous and downright foolish. A happy marriage equals a happy family.

  • Remember you and your husband were here first.
  • Make your relationship a priority. Sure you love your kids, but they will be better off knowing you love each other.
  • Look after your marriage as much as you look after your kids.
  • Communicate, communicate. Tell each other everything – the good, the bad, and the ugly. Don’t let it fester.
  • Kids feed off mom and dad’s love for each other. It’s healthy for them to see you kissing and hugging. It gives them a sense of security.
  • Make time for each other. Sure this is hard at times, but so important.
  • Make love not war. Sex is good for your relationship. It brings you closer and hey it’s that special thing only you have.

Always remember why you fell in love with your partner in the first place. Make an effort to keep the passion you had for your partner alive, sure it won’t be like the beginning, but be as passionate as you can about the relationship you have with each other. The rest will be easy.

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A Father on Father’s Day

June 19, 2009

I loved my Dad and I miss him. It’s been five years since he passed. This Sunday the loss of him will pull at me again. The last few years whenever I saw him I always hugged him and told him I loved him. Growing up I didn’t do those things a lot. I’m glad I did later on. 

Father’s aren’t perfect. God knows we make lots of mistakes, but it’s so important for children to have a strong father-figure in their lives. 

No matter what’s transpired during the day I always tell my kids I love them when I arrive home from work and at bedtime. 

As a father I thrive on the love I receive in return. To love and be truly loved back is what life is all about. 

Daughters especially seem to need the love of fathers. I have four daughters, two are grown up now, and two are growing up. The greatest mistake of my life was letting one of them down in a big way when she needed me. It’s something I’ll regret the rest of my life. Dads make mistakes. With the support of my loving wife I’ve worked hard at learning from my mistakes and improving as a person and a father. 

Sons need their fathers, but differently than girls. Fathers must work hard to be good role models for sons. Sometimes I don’t realize how much my son loves me until I see how he is trying hard to emulate me. At those times the impact I’m making on him as a father becomes very clear. 

Being a father is a huge responsibility. I’m working hard to be a good one. I love you kids.


“Oxymoron” for Writers

June 17, 2009

oxymoron-799173Definition of “Oxymoron” 

A figure of speech in which contradictory terms appear side by side.

 

 

Some of my favorite examples:

open secret                           pretty ugly
free love                                 military intelligence
extinct life                             working holiday
freezer burn                           silent scream
near miss                                crash landing
taped live                               peacekeeper missile
old news                                 original copies

The following quote is one of the most famous usages of oxymorons of all time to writers. At the very least it’s an excellent illustration of how this device can be used in prose.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way . . .,”

 Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities.


Nightmares of the Road

June 16, 2009
Christine - Stephen King's Nightmare

Christine - Stephen King's Nightmare

Ten Drivers to Avoid

The summer driving season is upon us. Just in time for our road adventures here’s my list of your worst nightmares roaming the highways and byways.

1. Cell Phone Talkers.
Drivers talking on cell phones oblivious to their surroundings.

2. No Turn Signals.
Those who never signal turns or lane changes. Seems those driving the most expensive cars are the worst. I was sure BMW and Cadillac installed signals on their vehicles. 

3. Tailgaters.
Yes those drivers who try to save gas by slipstreaming you. Either that or they want a tow.

 4. Lane changers.
Those who constantly change lanes trying to get ahead. Especially bad on three lane or more high speed interstates or expressways.

 5. Red light runners.
Death personified. If you’re in the front row when the light turns green make sure you look both ways, one of these idiots is sure to be just accelerating through the intersection; after all doesn’t red mean speed up.

6. Turtles.
Those who drive ridiculously slow, thirty in a 50 mph zone for example, and always on a two-lane road where passing is impossible. Worse than speeders.

 7. Horn Blowers.
You know, the one behind you laying on the horn when you’re stopped to let a pedestrian cross, or one of the more memorable ones who was blasting the horn when I was stopped by a policeman at an unlighted intersection letting traffic cross.

8. Rearview Mirror.
Drivers who never look in the rearview mirror. They believe no one else is on the road.

 9. Speeders.
Those who simply must pass everyone on the road no matter how fast they’re going. The oddity here is that they are the drivers who never get stopped.

 10. Ignoramuses.
These are the ones who never yield the right of way; never let you in a line of merging cars, and God forbid, are never considerate.

Drive decent and just try to ignore these persons, maybe they’ll go away.


Remembering Bobby

June 5, 2009
Senator Robert F. Kennedy
Robert Francis Kennedy, November 20, 1925 – June 6, 1968

Time is on My Side

June 5, 2009
Symbol of Time - Clock

Symbol of Time - Clock

Time slips by far too quickly it seems. Why is it as you age it passes faster than when you were young? Likely just an illusion, but still my perception.

Last evening I made a resolution. I just have to find more time for writing. Family time is so important, and of course full time employment keeps the wolves from the door. Somewhere between the two I intend to spend an hour or two writing and querying magazines about the finished articles I have.

Finding time to read is also a problem. As a writer one must read. I read on the train to and from work. Before bed I read. Television is a time waster, but for a writer of nonfiction, the news and the History Channel are useful.

Jim Croce wrote a song called “Time in a Bottle” about wishing to be able to put it in a bottle and keep it. Nice thought, but time is non-renewable. Once it’s gone its gone. The secret is to manage it to your advantage. Easier said than done.


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